I’d like to tell you a little story…
When my kids were young, like many parents, I wanted to impart the true spirit of the Holidays: the joy of giving. I’d take them to the store to pick out a toy which we’d promptly donate to a toy drive. I’d explain why we were doing this and I knew they felt good helping a child in need. But still, it was about toys on Christmas morning. I wondered if the message was strong enough to last beyond the day or beyond the “stuff”. What else could they be a part of that would help them feel the spirit of giving? So with full agreement (and frankly, relief) from our extended families, including all the kids, we created a new family tradition.
Rather than buy gifts for anyone outside of our immediate families, we decided we’d donate to charities or organizations in need. I know, I know. Not a new idea, BUT…
I thought I’d share with you HOW we chose to do it (two ways actually) in case they inspire a new tradition for you…
The parameters for each method were essentially the same: no dollar amount was set. We’d each give what we could and keep the amount private. This wasn’t about the money. It was about the love.
With my husband’s side, each family would choose a charity they’d like to donate to and make the donation prior to our gathering. The kids would make a card or poster and prepare a small presentation. They’d say something like: “On your behalf, we decided to give to…” then they’d tell us the charity, describe the good work being done and how the donation would help make a difference. The card or poster was then presented to the family as a token of the heartfelt gift.
My family was larger so we decided to do it a bit differently. I’d wrap a box in pretty holiday paper, cut a slit through the top of the box then place the box on the fireplace hearth. Throughout the day, people would inconspicuously slip money into the box. Again, there was no set amount – each gave what they wanted or could, with no obligation if things were too tight that year (no one would know). After dinner, the kids would count up the money. Then the name of an adult was drawn from a bowl. That person would get to choose the charity to which all the money would be sent and they’d also get the tax receipt.
My kids loved these traditions, especially the second, because they liked to put their own money into the box. In fact, in the weeks leading up to Christmas, they’d actually ask to do extra chores so they could earn money to donate. (My baseboards were gleaming by Christmas Day!)
They were excited and proud to be a part of the giving spirit that’s behind the holy days of all faiths. Why? Because giving feels good.
Our gatherings became focused on good company, good food and doing a bit of good in the world.
Over the years as our families grew, and who, how and when we got together changed, the tradition slipped away. However, this year, my daughter, son and I are reviving it between ourselves.
With this year being what it is, we decided that none of us needs anything. We don’t want to be in stores anyway (if they’re even open) and we don’t want to shop online simply because we feel we have to, then worry about coordinating deliveries.
We simply want to feel happy and feel the spirit of the Holidays.
When I suggested we revive the tradition, I was proud it was met with enthusiasm and fond remembrance, all of us wondering why we had ever stopped.
We recognize that there’s a lot of need this year and we want to do something to help. Being working adults now, my kids are excited to choose their own charities and to be the ones making the donations. (I’m so looking forward to finding out which ones they’ve chosen to support!)
The day may look different this year. We won’t be getting together with anyone else. But the joy of giving will still be strong.
I share this story with you because today is Giving Tuesday.
If you’re not familiar with Giving Tuesday, it was started in 2012 as a response to the shopping frenzy of Black Friday and Cyber Monday. It’s become a global movement dedicated to giving back in whatever way you can.
This year has been difficult for everyone. There is great need wherever you look. If you can’t afford to donate money, consider donating your time, or help out someone you know (ie: pick up groceries for an elderly relative or neighbour), or simply share the social media posts of charities, organizations or do-good businesses you like and help spread the word of their good work.
I could list off the health benefits of giving, like lower blood pressure and stress levels, less anxiety and depression, and increased self-esteem. But simply said, the joy of giving, on any day, in any manner, feels good.
In a year when we’re not in control of much, we can still control how we feel.
Whenever we give from our heart, we live from our heart and the ripple effect of that love makes the world a little bit better.